Re: Obituary for Marie Taylor KD0AXG SK

Mike Morgan

Thank you Fred. A very moving Obituary.

----- Original Message -----
From: "fdittric" <>
To: "main" <>
Sent: Tuesday, October 29, 2019 3:17:45 PM
Subject: [CMRA] Obituary for Marie Taylor KD0AXG SK


Hank KD0BVQ requested that I post his obituary for Marie. See below.

The memorial service will be 2 miles or so from the nearest asphalt
road and I assume that it will be private. Please consider donating
to the hospice mentioned at the end. They did a great service for Marie.


Fred AE0FD


Marie died Friday 25 October 2019 after a long battle with breast cancer.

Marie wants cremation and a memorial ceremony in a few weeks or month
so all who wish can have time to make arrangements. It will be led
by our dear friend Sharon, in traditional Native tradition, ending
with having her ashes interred in the Native burial site at the top
of our hill, joining those of Pete Noce and our dear beloved Buddha
Kitty as well as previous Natives. We will circle up and pass the
Talking Stick around s the holder may say anything they wish (or be
silent and pass it on) As we share our thoughts and stories will all
come to know more of Marie collectively than we did individually.

Marie considered both her cancer and her death to be a blessing and
said so many times. She was deeply Zen Buddhist and these are
fundamental tenets of Zen. Some have told me they don't understand
how cancer and death could be blessings. If you look into that
literature you will come to a more profound understanding of
Marie. Please understand that I don't fault anyone for thinking and
feeling the way they do. I just offer this as a way for them to
understand how differently Marie thought and felt about this.

As a direct consequence of her profound Zen, when she got the news of
her ct scans in June she told me that this blessing freed her to drop
all other irrelevant obligations, and live and love with me in Zen
simplicity, maximizing her enjoyment to the end. She embarked on
dumping huge quantities of encumbrances to free her mind and be in
the present moment as much as possible. To sit with me in Zen
meditation mornings and sunset. To accept the challenges of losing
her morning bike ride and then even her ability to walk, as further
simplicity in her life.

I don't mean to make a saint of her. We had some painful times that
removed us from the present moment. But she always got back. We
acknowledged the Hospice motto "to live until you die" and she lived
powerfully and beautifully always and even more so during her last four months.

And it was truly a blessing for both of us. Not all blessings are
easy. This one had its difficult times but she never lost sight of
the blessing.

Her death was especially a blessing. When she awoke that morning
something broke in her belly and she had raging pain that took 1 1/2
hours to get under control with large amounts of morphine and help
from the urgently summoned hospice nurse. Pain broke thru 1/2 hour
later, and it took more breakthru morphine, then sufficient
maintenance morphine ongoingly to assure she was peaceful and pain
free till she breathed her last in the next hours. By which time
her entire sibship had arrived from StLouis, as well as Dave and
Geoff, and all stayed until she was taken to the mortuary.

She truly lived until she died. As the cancer progressed she took
each small setback or loss as another challenge which she always
met. Creative as always, her last and unfinished job was working on
repair of a lovely quilt of her creation, worn out by years of loving
use. She continued studying Chinese and traditional Chinese medicine
and acupuncture and qi points and as was as active as possible in Tai
Chi given that she was wheelchair bound. We rented a golf car and
built a series of ramps so she could get in it and ride the property
and have fun. She got out 3 or 4 times in her final month, that
way. She never gave in to disappointment or depression but just kept
living till her very last day.

She got the scans (reporting extensive spread of cancer to liver and
bones) a few days after our anniversary in July, and lived joyously
and lovingly with me until she departed on Friday 25 October. We had
almost daily opportunity to sit in quiet meditation on the back porch
we built together and watch sunset in this paradise. We cleaned out
and simplified so we could live a simple Zen life together. We
loved and treasured our time together and we knew the cancer was
truly a blessing. Marie told me that one of the most important goals
of her life was to make sure her Mom and Dad were able to spend the
end of their lives in their home. Since she was able to help make
sure this happened, she felt that she had accomplished one very
important purpose of her life, and she was satisfied. She helped her
mother die peacefully surrounded by her loving family and hoped to
get to die that way herself. We made it, and she's safe now.

We talked about and agreed on many things during this time and one
was on the Zen tradition of joyously celebrating the good fortune of
one who got to depart before us, having no fear of death. When my
turn comes I hope to do as well and beautifully as she did. she said
she wished she could become a cloud of energy encircling the earth
with peace and love, because that's what Earth needs so desperately now.

We strongly request no flowers, cards, food or baked goods, and
especially no consolation telephone calls (regular kind ok). If you
wish to do something Marie would love for you to do, make a donation
to the hospice that cared so lovingly and expertly in her final months.
Preferred Hospice
1900 N Providence Rd suite 311
Columbia Missouri 65202

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